It’s a stroke of luck to meet a girl who seems to be everything you’ve been searching for. Maybe you’ve truly found the perfect match. On the other hand, the world is full of people who are willing to pretend to be anything to get what they want. They behave in ways that make it hard for you to suspect you’re being trapped. However, you can distinguish a genuinely suitable girl from one who is just pretending to be perfect. Here’s how to tell if her perfection is nothing more than a beautiful mask.
She Shows Tendencies to Control
Have you ever played Jenga? If so, you know how difficult it is to keep the tower upright when even the smallest piece can cause it to collapse. The same can be said for a girl who has tendencies to control. If she tries to manage you and often interferes in matters that don’t concern her, she might be pretending to be perfect. Most likely, she wants something from you rather than you yourself.
She Limits What You See in Her
If a girl hides important aspects of her life from you, such as friends, work, or family, it’s a red flag. This is especially true if you have known each other for a long time and have been together for at least three months. Generally, people with sincere intentions are not shy about introducing you to others and sharing different parts of their lives. Such secrecy might be a clever way to appear better than she really is.
She is Overly Critical of Others
A common manipulative technique is to be extremely kind to those who might be useful while treating others poorly. Your girl might criticize and judge others but never directs such behavior toward you. To her, you are an exception to all rules, the best and most deserving person on earth. But think about it: what could be lurking in the heart of someone who acts this way? She might generally have a low opinion of people, especially those she can’t benefit from, or have a negative outlook on life. Now, consider what she might say behind your back, especially when you stop being the object of her selfish interest. Her behavior is pure hypocrisy, from which nothing good can come.
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She Attaches Positive Labels to Herself
Labels are often negative, but there are exceptions. Your girl might frequently describe herself in positive terms, calling herself an “empath,” a “tolerant person,” and so on. What’s wrong with that? Typically, if someone possesses such positive traits, they don’t need to constantly declare them. They simply live according to their values and beliefs, and their good qualities are evident in their actions. Positive labels are used to create a certain image in your mind. Once you believe in them, the girl gains the ability to manipulate you without fearing that you’ll think badly of her.
She Doesn’t Keep Promises and Commitments
Being a good person and pretending to be one are two different things. Your girl might seem perfect and ideal in her words, but when it comes to fulfilling promises and commitments, problems arise. If her words don’t match her actions, don’t chalk it up to absent-mindedness or forgetfulness. This could be a sign that she’s not as good as she seems and that you aren’t that important to her. It’s crucial to notice when someone’s words don’t align with their actions to reconsider whether you want to stay in such a relationship.
She’s Overly Interested in Your Life
It’s nice when someone shows interest in your work, hobbies, and habits. But sometimes, it can be overwhelming, making you feel uncomfortable. Your girl might subtly push you to reveal life details you’d rather keep private or be too intrusive when discussing your past. This may not be just a desire to understand and know you better. Often, such behavior is about “gathering data” to use as leverage later. Moreover, this excessive interest can create a false sense of closeness to gain control over you.
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She Plays the Victim
People can play the victim unconsciously, but often, it hides less than noble intentions. A classic example is when a girl tries to make you her hero, who must save her from all problems and misfortunes. This tactic makes it easier to manipulate you and get what she wants. Don’t fall for the sense of importance and masculinity you feel when you “rescue” your girlfriend repeatedly, especially if it feels like it’s become your duty. Think about whether she genuinely needs your help or if she could solve the problem herself with some effort. Or maybe there isn’t even a real problem—just stories about how the world has wronged her and how cruel the people around her are?
