At times, it may seem that life is nothing but a series of problems and difficulties.
Every day brings small setbacks, and occasionally, more serious ones. When you fixate on these challenges, you begin to see yourself as a helpless victim. What can you do when fate itself seems to be against you? The truth is, not much is required — just a change in perspective, a shift in how you view things from the outside. Life is both harsh and kind to everyone in roughly equal measure. Of course, there are exceptions, but it’s still possible to make peace with it. Constructive dialogue and positive changes happen when a person stops blaming life without reason.
The Severity of a Problem Is Defined by You
You wake up in the morning, leave your house, and notice that your car has a flat tire. The first thought: “Not again.” Now it feels like the whole day will be gloomy because it started with an unexpected challenge. While there’s nothing pleasant about it, it’s hardly a catastrophe. However, depending on the circumstances and your emotional state, your perception may vary. It’s one thing if you were just heading to the store, and another if you’re already late for work. When faced with such minor problems, we often ask ourselves, “Why did this happen to me?” No one provides an answer, but the truth is, it happens to many people. Today, it just happens to be your turn. You could have checked the tire the night before or left the house a bit earlier instead of right before you needed to leave. Random mishaps happen to everyone, and most of the time, they are neutral and have no serious consequences. They are a byproduct of life and only become a problem if you decide to see them that way. Imagine how much emotional energy is wasted on analyzing these little things, sometimes even making you feel like the unluckiest person in the world. But everything changes when you start to take these random problems more lightly, viewing them from an outsider’s perspective.
Life Is a Teacher, and Problems Are Lessons
Life is cyclical. Highs and lows alternate, though not always in perfect proportion. Some people climb the career ladder or change jobs by choice, while others get fired for being late or not meeting job expectations. The same differences exist in personal relationships, hobbies, and everyday activities. It seems like life comes easier to some, as if they are the teacher’s pets in a classroom, receiving lenient treatment. Others, however, are judged more strictly. To some extent, this is true, but everything has a backstory. Life, like a schoolteacher, doesn’t choose favorites randomly. Every problem contains a lesson, one that can either be learned or skipped. When something unpleasant happens, it’s hard for a person to stay calm — plans crumble, emotions take over. That’s why it’s better to work through mistakes a little later, hours or even days after the shock has subsided. The lesson from a flat tire is to be more cautious and develop a habit of allowing extra time for emergencies in any plan. Once you’ve learned the lesson, you won’t encounter the same problem again — or rather, you’ll stop seeing it as a problem. It will become a minor inconvenience that’s easy to overcome.
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Firmware Update
In childhood, we acquire basic knowledge and skills that help us survive and integrate successfully into society. We learn not to be rude to elders, to be kind and responsive, and to remain attentive, especially when crossing the street. We are taught not to talk to strangers, not to give in to destructive emotions like anger and envy. Following these basic principles, a child gradually becomes an acceptable member of society. However, as we transition into adulthood, things become more complex. The old firmware still contains useful functions but needs updating. Otherwise, you will no longer meet the status of an adult. You are no longer required to be nice to everyone, tiptoe around, and please adults. In fact, this can become detrimental. Conversely, qualities that were once criticized, such as assertiveness or self-centeredness, now become virtues. Significant changes also need to occur in how you perceive time. A child always looks forward to the future, eager to grow up quickly. Once that process is complete, you need to shift to living in the present. This means spending less time daydreaming and focusing more on reality.
Realize That the Choice Is Yours
What you have now is the result of your actions or inactions. Even if you preferred to go with the flow and live on autopilot, that was still your choice. You can change your situation at any moment, though the later you start, the harder it will be. Over time, additional obligations accumulate, and you become increasingly dependent on circumstances. Recognizing the need for change, people often wait for a better moment — this is the worst thing they can do. Waiting for the right moment is a victim’s tactic, reflecting a lack of understanding of life and fear of the future. Some planning is necessary, but the process should not drag on for months or years. Every plan has its gaps. Nothing is guaranteed one hundred percent except for the absence of change if you never take the first step.
