Coffee dates are a simple and beloved option for spending time together. They’re ideal for a first meeting, offering a balance of comfort and flexibility. Whether you’re trying to keep things casual or set the stage for something more serious, a coffee date is a great way to connect in a relaxed atmosphere. However, there are a few etiquette rules to follow when planning and attending such a date.
Choose the Right Time
The beauty of coffee dates is that they can last as long as you and your date desire. You could meet for a quick break during lunch or linger at the café until it closes. That said, a coffee date shouldn’t last less than an hour – anything shorter can feel rushed and awkward. Avoid scheduling it too late in the evening, especially if you’ll be drinking espresso; otherwise, you might both end up sacrificing a good night’s sleep.
Pick a Cozy Café
The more interesting and atmospheric the coffee shop, the better. A beautiful, unique environment can help sustain conversation. For instance, during an awkward pause, you can easily draw attention to a charming detail in the decor to spark a new topic and keep the conversation flowing. Another reason to choose an unusual venue is novelty – your date is unlikely to be impressed by a chain café she’s visited many times before.
Dress Smartly but Comfortably
Treat every first date the same: no matter where you’re going, dress comfortably, tastefully, and in a way that reflects your personality. There’s no need to wear restrictive trendy outfits or pretend to be someone you’re not. Show your individual style instead. If you often wear suits, choose one that suits you best. A smart-casual look works great, offering a blend of sophistication and versatility. Coffee dates also allow for casual attire, especially if you’re meeting during the day. However, avoid athletic wear, even if it’s your go-to. Instead, opt for favorite jeans paired with a shirt, sweatshirt, or sweater.
Suggest Extending the Date
It’s great when a date is going well, but the café environment might eventually feel stale, especially if it’s crowded or noisy. Should you suggest going elsewhere or end the date? It’s best to have a backup plan in case you want to continue spending time together. Consider nearby places she might enjoy, such as an amusement park, a scenic park, a riverside promenade, or a live music bar. If such options are available, suggest taking a walk after finishing your coffee.
Be Polite to the Staff
How you interact with the baristas and other staff impacts your appeal. No one likes a date who is rude, impatient, or speaks negatively about others. Even if something goes wrong, stay calm and polite, and leave a tip if the service was good.
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Keep Your Phone Away
The golden rule of a great date is to stay engaged and interested in the conversation. Scrolling through your phone is a surefire way to ruin the moment, so put it away. Of course, unexpected important calls can happen; in that case, apologize and step away briefly. Otherwise, texts, notifications, and news updates can wait.
Respect Her Preferences
Just because it’s a coffee date doesn’t mean your companion has to order coffee. She might prefer tea, juice, or a smoothie – don’t insist that she try a latte or cappuccino. Respecting her preferences shows that you’re considerate and genuinely interested in her.
Don’t Pretend to Be an Expert
If you’re not well-versed in coffee brands or brewing methods, don’t pretend to be an expert. Trying to impress your date without knowledge usually backfires. Instead, learning something together can be a fun bonding experience. If she happens to be a coffee enthusiast, let her take the lead and use it as an opportunity to learn more about her interests.
Don’t Skip the Pastries
Don’t stop at just coffee – order a cheesecake or pastry for yourself and your date. This thoughtful gesture won’t go unnoticed, as it shows generosity and adds a touch of sweetness to the occasion. However, if you know she’s on a diet or you’re unsure what to pick, simply ask her what she’d like as a treat to accompany the drinks.